I'm grateful for blue-corn-encrusted-catfish tacos
And the friend who dragged me out to
experience them
post bible study last night.
A weird day, yesterday, with various items
between the bookends of sunup
and sundown. Some items small:
slow morning and earl grey tea. Some
things foreign and painful: cancer
treatment center and 21 brothers gone
ahead into eternity. Some items
weighty and convicting: would I be a
Caleb or Joshua or one of the fearful 10?
A weird day, seemingly random, sprinkled
with the beautiful and the painful. A sample of
a lifetime, days touched by cancer and the
witnesses who go before us, tacos and good company.
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Bouncing step and fiery love
Madigan, handsome red head
with bouncing step
and warm belly laugh.
Passionate and fiery, you walk - no
run - through life with the beauty and
power of a thunderstorm.
You love your brothers and kin
with a pure and deep love that
pierces and builds.
May you be always be Tough and
Tender. Tough in standing by your
convictions and protecting those
you love. Tender toward the Truth of
God and your care of His Kingdom.
Know that you are deeply loved.
Happy birthday from your Ankie Tae.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
tap tap - is this thing on?
What I would like to say if I was ever given an open mic in a group of single peers and brave enough to actually say anything:
(From a single woman to the single men:)
Why are you dating us? If it's for a good time or a social companion, fine. If it's for the purpose of finding a potential spouse, even better. But either way (and anything in between) please define it. And define it early and often, as the relationship changes and grows. Don't leave us guessing or put us in the awkward place of having to bring it up first.
Give us more than just a couple dates. Some of us are shy and unsure. But even if we're not shy and unsure, we're also not going to let you see the "real me" until we know we can trust you with that info. Show us that you are safe and trustworthy and we'll open up.
When you protect us, that needs to include, most importantly, our heart. It's our job to protect our hearts, too, so please know you don't bear that responsibility on your own. And it's our job to help protect your heart by being sincere and honest with you.
When you define things for us, you set us free to enjoy the experience of dating you and the parameters help immensely in keeping our hearts appropriately paced with the progress or status of the relationship.
We've all bought into the current culture's model (demand) of physical beauty and good looks. No, really, we all have. Women just as much as men. So can we agree to and encourage each other to remember to look through that physical body (not ignoring it) to the heart and mind? Can we all agree that after a kid or two or a couple decades that body will most likely look very different? The heart and mind will continue to grow, while the body will (rather quickly) deteriorate. Are your physical "requirements" realistic, given this inevitability?
Every (non platonic) physical touch has an emotional tie to our heart. The more intimate the touch the deeper the tie. This is a beautiful thing with appropriate (and verbalized) commitment. It's a very scary thing without and can bring about deep insecurity and confusion. Understand that you have no idea what these heart stings feel like or how strong they are, so just trust us when we say they are there and very real. I may even say a woman's desire for emotional intimacy and security is as strong as a man's desire for sex.
Feedback welcome. And the huge assumptions surrounding this piece are shamelessly admitted to and provided upon request.
And thank you to the men out there who are aware of and doing these things. You're my heroes.
(From a single woman to the single men:)
Why are you dating us? If it's for a good time or a social companion, fine. If it's for the purpose of finding a potential spouse, even better. But either way (and anything in between) please define it. And define it early and often, as the relationship changes and grows. Don't leave us guessing or put us in the awkward place of having to bring it up first.
Give us more than just a couple dates. Some of us are shy and unsure. But even if we're not shy and unsure, we're also not going to let you see the "real me" until we know we can trust you with that info. Show us that you are safe and trustworthy and we'll open up.
When you protect us, that needs to include, most importantly, our heart. It's our job to protect our hearts, too, so please know you don't bear that responsibility on your own. And it's our job to help protect your heart by being sincere and honest with you.
When you define things for us, you set us free to enjoy the experience of dating you and the parameters help immensely in keeping our hearts appropriately paced with the progress or status of the relationship.
We've all bought into the current culture's model (demand) of physical beauty and good looks. No, really, we all have. Women just as much as men. So can we agree to and encourage each other to remember to look through that physical body (not ignoring it) to the heart and mind? Can we all agree that after a kid or two or a couple decades that body will most likely look very different? The heart and mind will continue to grow, while the body will (rather quickly) deteriorate. Are your physical "requirements" realistic, given this inevitability?
Every (non platonic) physical touch has an emotional tie to our heart. The more intimate the touch the deeper the tie. This is a beautiful thing with appropriate (and verbalized) commitment. It's a very scary thing without and can bring about deep insecurity and confusion. Understand that you have no idea what these heart stings feel like or how strong they are, so just trust us when we say they are there and very real. I may even say a woman's desire for emotional intimacy and security is as strong as a man's desire for sex.
Feedback welcome. And the huge assumptions surrounding this piece are shamelessly admitted to and provided upon request.
And thank you to the men out there who are aware of and doing these things. You're my heroes.
Sunday, January 11, 2015
two reactions
I've lately observed two reactions to sin made by Christians:
On one side of the scale, we say, "I sinned, I'm a sinner, I'm going to keep sinning." Shoulders shrugged in an "oh well" and followed a sort of cavalier attitude toward it all. Something like "oops, sorrynotsorry" and an unwillingness to put ourselves in places where we won't fail in sin. It is a disregard from the grace and sacrifice made on the Cross and the call to holiness (that will always seem foreign and out of touch in our current culture).
On the other side of the scale, we say, "I sinned, I'm a loser, I don't deserve God's love, I'll never amount to anything because of it, there's no way to move past the past." This is a strange form of pride (?) and also a complete disregard for the grace and sacrifice of the Cross.
As Christians, we need to be fleeing from both sides of this scale - we need to confess and acknowledge our sin, call it what it is, recognize the consequences, move away and move on, and put ourselves in positions where we will succeed in obedience to God.
On one side of the scale, we say, "I sinned, I'm a sinner, I'm going to keep sinning." Shoulders shrugged in an "oh well" and followed a sort of cavalier attitude toward it all. Something like "oops, sorrynotsorry" and an unwillingness to put ourselves in places where we won't fail in sin. It is a disregard from the grace and sacrifice made on the Cross and the call to holiness (that will always seem foreign and out of touch in our current culture).
On the other side of the scale, we say, "I sinned, I'm a loser, I don't deserve God's love, I'll never amount to anything because of it, there's no way to move past the past." This is a strange form of pride (?) and also a complete disregard for the grace and sacrifice of the Cross.
As Christians, we need to be fleeing from both sides of this scale - we need to confess and acknowledge our sin, call it what it is, recognize the consequences, move away and move on, and put ourselves in positions where we will succeed in obedience to God.
Friday, January 9, 2015
lion chasers
Lion chasers challenge the status quo. They climb cliffs, move the foreign countries, and build boats in the desert. Lion chasers are often considered crazy, but they are able to do these things because they aren't afraid of uncertainty. They don't need to know what is coming next because they know that God knows. They don't need explanations for every disappointment because they know that God has a plan. Lion chasers refuse to settle down because they want to experience every divine twist and turn that God has in store for them.
~ source unknown (found on Kendall Jennings' facebook page)
~ source unknown (found on Kendall Jennings' facebook page)
Thursday, January 8, 2015
safety
A man can make a woman feel physically safe, but she can still feel emotionally unsafe.
A man who makes a woman feel emotionally safe (almost) automatically will also make her feel physically safe.
A man who makes a woman feel emotionally safe (almost) automatically will also make her feel physically safe.
Monday, December 22, 2014
2014 in Review
A few things I learned / experienced this past year:
1) God is working in the background, rolling out His plan, even (especially) when we think He's completely forgotten or doesn't care.
2) You can't change people. But you can encourage them and show them dignity.
3) I have the cutest and sweetest horse in the world.
4) I really like Ford F150 trucks. Especially the one in my name. It is a gift.
5) I have some really good friends. They encourage me to be a better person and they challenge me.
6) I don't know how I could love a Doodlebug more than I already do. (He is currently at my feet as I type this.)
7) Flagstaff Arizona in October is probably my most favorite and familiar place / time to be. Ever.
8) Work will always be hard this side of eternity. May I learn to come at it hungry, humble and enthusiastic.
9) The book Unbroken may be the best book I've read in a long time. Warning: don't read it on a plane, your fellow passengers will wonder why there are tears streaming down your face.
10) I have the cutest nephews in the world. Seriously, they are the best. I'm so glad I get to be Ankie Tae in their lives.
11) Hope really is the anchor for our soul.
12) I love being Auntie K to about dozen other kiddos. I've loved our barn days, hikes, and time together this past year, and I'm hoping for a whole lot more this coming year.
13) Love is strenuous. Christian love doesn't give up on people. It's very much like running a race. You stick with it. ~ Tim Keller
14) I don't ever want to go back to Chicago in February. Way.Too.Cold.
15) I'm missing New York City. It's been a year since I've been there and I need to go back soon. It's an unlikely love.
16) I may have taken a couple work calls from the back of my horse this past year.
17) His mercies are new every morning.
18) I really like taking walks. With kiddos, with my dog, with friends. Thankful that Austin has some great trails nearby.
19) I learned to love West Wing and Trader Joe's coffee, thanks to my friend Kim. (They had me captive for two months earlier this year, so I really didn't have a choice...)
20) The Ang Lee version of Sense and Sensibility is probably my most favorite movie of all time.
1) God is working in the background, rolling out His plan, even (especially) when we think He's completely forgotten or doesn't care.
2) You can't change people. But you can encourage them and show them dignity.
3) I have the cutest and sweetest horse in the world.
4) I really like Ford F150 trucks. Especially the one in my name. It is a gift.
5) I have some really good friends. They encourage me to be a better person and they challenge me.
6) I don't know how I could love a Doodlebug more than I already do. (He is currently at my feet as I type this.)
7) Flagstaff Arizona in October is probably my most favorite and familiar place / time to be. Ever.
8) Work will always be hard this side of eternity. May I learn to come at it hungry, humble and enthusiastic.
9) The book Unbroken may be the best book I've read in a long time. Warning: don't read it on a plane, your fellow passengers will wonder why there are tears streaming down your face.
10) I have the cutest nephews in the world. Seriously, they are the best. I'm so glad I get to be Ankie Tae in their lives.
11) Hope really is the anchor for our soul.
12) I love being Auntie K to about dozen other kiddos. I've loved our barn days, hikes, and time together this past year, and I'm hoping for a whole lot more this coming year.
13) Love is strenuous. Christian love doesn't give up on people. It's very much like running a race. You stick with it. ~ Tim Keller
14) I don't ever want to go back to Chicago in February. Way.Too.Cold.
15) I'm missing New York City. It's been a year since I've been there and I need to go back soon. It's an unlikely love.
16) I may have taken a couple work calls from the back of my horse this past year.
17) His mercies are new every morning.
18) I really like taking walks. With kiddos, with my dog, with friends. Thankful that Austin has some great trails nearby.
19) I learned to love West Wing and Trader Joe's coffee, thanks to my friend Kim. (They had me captive for two months earlier this year, so I really didn't have a choice...)
20) The Ang Lee version of Sense and Sensibility is probably my most favorite movie of all time.
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
Never Forget
Both are the most honorable men I know; the first in giving his life in honor, and the second in living his life in honor.
Both are my heroes.
Saturday, November 15, 2014
one person
one person
tall but small
courage to shove the worry aside
block it at the door
no entering in
in life's dark and rattling moments
You bring courage and put me where
and when
You want me
feeling unprepared and
awkward and inept
Your words flow
Your grace floods through
in my smallness
You give me with courage
and grace and truth
help me be small in worry
and tall in what is good
I am just a tall and small person
but willing
willing for You to move me
and use me and put me where
courage and grace and truth
will change me and
lend hope to those I touch
You are all I need
tall but small
courage to shove the worry aside
block it at the door
no entering in
in life's dark and rattling moments
You bring courage and put me where
and when
You want me
feeling unprepared and
awkward and inept
Your words flow
Your grace floods through
in my smallness
You give me with courage
and grace and truth
help me be small in worry
and tall in what is good
I am just a tall and small person
but willing
willing for You to move me
and use me and put me where
courage and grace and truth
will change me and
lend hope to those I touch
You are all I need
Sunday, November 9, 2014
So, I'm not a feminist - part 9
Kevin Williamson's latest NRO article is brilliant. Below are a couple excerpts:
Thus do the champions of diversity and women’s autonomy reveal themselves: If a woman believes that perhaps Barack Obama and Harry Reid are doing the country more harm than good — if a woman believes that lower taxes are in fact a pretty important issue — that’s not a disagreement: It’s a sign that something is “wrong with you.” Pro-choice? Sure, but not when it comes to your politics — on that subject, the Left is as anti-choice and ruthlessly conformist as it is possible to be.
Who do Americans want to be when they grow up? Do women aspire to a life like Julia’s, or to one more like that of Lieutenant Colonel Joni Ernst? Would you rather be a sanctimonious sack of woe, like Wendy Davis, or a happy warrior, like Mia Love? Would you rather vote for a party that speaks to you as a citizen, family member, entrepreneur, taxpayer, etc. — or one that insists you owe it not only your vote but your obedience simply because you have a certain configuration of chromosomes or a certain surname?
Thus do the champions of diversity and women’s autonomy reveal themselves: If a woman believes that perhaps Barack Obama and Harry Reid are doing the country more harm than good — if a woman believes that lower taxes are in fact a pretty important issue — that’s not a disagreement: It’s a sign that something is “wrong with you.” Pro-choice? Sure, but not when it comes to your politics — on that subject, the Left is as anti-choice and ruthlessly conformist as it is possible to be.
Who do Americans want to be when they grow up? Do women aspire to a life like Julia’s, or to one more like that of Lieutenant Colonel Joni Ernst? Would you rather be a sanctimonious sack of woe, like Wendy Davis, or a happy warrior, like Mia Love? Would you rather vote for a party that speaks to you as a citizen, family member, entrepreneur, taxpayer, etc. — or one that insists you owe it not only your vote but your obedience simply because you have a certain configuration of chromosomes or a certain surname?
It
is one of life’s little ironies that it is the feminists and the party
of so-called women’s issues who in the 21st century still have not quite
figured out that women are individuals, and that there is more to them
than the sum of their parts.
Read more of the article here.
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