Here's where I think my frustration lies:
For all appearances, it may look like I've chosen career over family (or a relationship). I spend my day at the computer and on the phone. I project plan, tell other people what to do, do what other people tell me to do, etc. I am not supporting a husband or raising kids. In fact, I would most likely give a blank stare if asked a question about child behavior or how many ounces are in a cup.
I have not chosen the career path. It is the path that has been chosen for me (for now?). I'm pursuing it because it's what is in front of me. It's what I've been called to do.
But is the career path something I will just "throw off" as soon as the right guy comes along and the kids show up? I think not. Shouldn't what I do now comprise of WHO I am? What I was designed to do? I don't think what God has gifted me to do will completely stop (or be considered irrelevant) when family comes along. Family should be incorporated into what God has called me to do. And what I've been called to do will rightly and beautifully fit with what my husband will be called to do. Together we will more effectively do work in God's Kingdom. Together we will more effectively do what He's called us to do. But for now, what I'm called to do is better done as a single. And that's a good thing. It's exciting.
So I may look like the career woman, the feminist, the "I control my own life and I'm doing with it what I want." But that is a superficial and incorrect assumption of who I am. I am a woman of God, daughter of the King, serving in His kingdom, doing this job at hand to the best of my ability, until I'm called to the next job. I live not for myself - I was created by Him and for Him and to serve in His kingdom - single or married.
3 comments:
Beautifully put! Whoever marries you is one lucky man! I'll make sure to point that out.:)
I should send Brandon the link to your blog...
Seriously.
We must be telepathic or something... I've been thinking about this very thing. Of course, I'm at a different state in this process.
I came to the conclusion that it doesn't matter if I work or not. It matters if work is so important that family doesn't come first (even if I were the only immediate family living in my house).
If I had kids, I would probably not be looking for a job right now. The reason? Because I have experienced the benefit of having a mom who is always there for me, and I would want my kids to have that same experience.
But the fact of the matter is that I don't have kids. Am I married? Yes. But it really hasn't made a difference, in my relationship, whether I've worked or not. What did make a difference was how I used my time, and whether or not I did things that I found fulfilling (with or without pay).
When my husband gets back, after 6 months across the country, I know that I will want to re-prioritize.
I guess I look at it like this: every stage in life (e.g., single, married, parents) has pros and cons. I've decided that, wherever I fall, I need to focus on how God made me and live the life He wants me to live (confession: easier said than done...). It sounds like you've headed in that general direction, too(?).
Post a Comment